Solo Travel With Social Anxiety: What It’s Really Like
I’m not going to sugar coat it: solo travel with social anxiety is kind of terrifying!
The thought of navigating airports, accommodation and unfamiliar cities without anyone to rely on?
Past Katie, who felt (and still sometimes feels) terrified even just asking for a coffee, would’ve said a very firm, very quick no thank you!
And because of these feelings, solo travel can feel impossible for people like us.
If you’re anything like me, you’re probably wondering something like this: Can I actually do this? What does it really feel like to travel alone when social stuff doesn’t come easy to me?
Well, I’m here to answer both of those questions in this blog post!
I’ve travelled solo to 24+ European countries, felt awkward in restaurants full of confident strangers, and had full-on meltdowns trying to book a dream group tour I knew would involve small talk.
But I’ve also learned how to make solo travel work with my social anxiety instead of constantly fighting it.
So if you’re dreaming about solo travel but you’re scared of freezing up in social situations, or you’re worried you’re just “too anxious” to travel alone – keep reading. I’ve got you.
We’re going to walk through what solo travel with social anxiety actually looks like (the good, the hard, the ugly and the surprisingly empowering), how to manage it practically, and how to feel a whole lot more confident while doing your own thing!
Disclaimer: Some of the links on this blog are affiliate links. That means if you click on one and make a purchase, I may earn a small commission – at no extra cost to you. I only recommend products, places and services I genuinely love and use on my own solo travels. Thank you for supporting my adventures so I can continue to provide free content on this blog! 💛
What Is Social Anxiety?
Social anxiety isn’t just shyness or being a bit introverted. It’s a persistent fear of being judged, rejected or embarrassed in front of others – and it can affect everything from ordering a coffee to asking for directions.
It’s also important to know that social anxiety affects different people in different ways.
For me, I have tendencies to overthink (and over-analyse) after even a simple conversation, rehearse simple interactions over and over in my head, and even avoid situations altogether if they feel too uncertain.
It’s exhausting and overwhelming to think about, but understanding how your anxiety operates is the first step in taking some of its power away. Because once you recognise your patterns and triggers, you can then begin to work with them instead of trying to ignore them (which never works!)
Katie’s Top Tip: Start paying attention to when your anxiety flares up. Noticing which situations make you anxious will help you plan for them and build confidence before you even leave home.
What Is Solo Travel, Really?
If your only knowledge of solo travel is someone posing for Instagram, on a beach in Thailand, surrounded by new best friends they met five minutes ago… I definitely get it. That’s the image we’ve all been sold on social media, right?
But that’s not the full picture.
Solo travel, at its most basic definition, just means travelling on your own.
And that can look however you want it to look.
Sometimes you’ll feel completely free and at ease – exploring a new city, ordering a coffee, people-watching in an old town square.
But other times, you’ll feel lonely or overwhelmed because you can’t figure out how the bus works and you’re too anxious to ask for help.
Both experiences are equally valid, and are equal parts of solo travel.
Katie’s Top Tip: Don’t fall into the trap of thinking you have to “do” solo travel a certain way. Your version of solo travel will look entirely different to mine, and that’s more than okay.
Should You Solo Travel With Social Anxiety?
Yes, you absolutely can solo travel with social anxiety – but it’s also okay if it’s not the right time for you yet (we’ll get to that in just a second).
The answer to this question really depends on your current headspace, your support systems and what you’re hoping to get out of the experience of solo travel.
Solo travel can be incredibly empowering for people with social anxiety because it removes a lot of the social pressure we face in daily life. You don’t have to perform for anyone. You’re in a space where no one knows you. And you get to control the pace.
But it can also be extremely confronting. Without your usual safety nets, your anxiety will almost certainly feel louder at first. Things like asking for help, making decisions for yourself or eating out alone will push you far out of your comfort zone.
That’s why preparation, self-awareness and gentle boundaries are key.
If you’ve already done some emotional groundwork (therapy, journaling, self-regulation, etc), solo travel can be a great and natural next step in rebuilding your confidence.
Katie’s Top Tip: Be honest when you ask yourself this question: Is the idea of solo travel exciting but scary – or just plain scary? If there’s even a tiny bit of excitement beneath the fear, that’s your sign it’s worth exploring.
My Honest Experience With Solo Travel and Social Anxiety
I want to tell you a bit about my story now. Because while you may look at this blog and see all of the countries, towns, cities, national parks, UNESCO sites, etc I’ve visited solo, and think I’m incredibly brave, I want you to know this: solo travel didn’t cure my social anxiety.
I still feel it. Every single day. Every time I board a plane. Every time I visit a new city or join a group tour. Every time I even go outside, there’s an underlying thrum of uncertainty.
I didn’t hop off a plane one and suddenly become a bubbly extrovert making friends on walking tours!
In fact, during my first few solo trips, I spent more time crying in hotel rooms, delaying going out for the day because I felt too nervous, and making pretend phone calls or scrolling on my phone just so I didn’t look like I had no friends, than I did actually travelling.
I’ve also almost backed out of more trips than I can count. Felt sick to my stomach on my way to the airport. Cried in said airports, and on planes and on buses and in hotel rooms…
If you look at those moments of my solo travel journey, it’s been kind of a hot mess!
But it’s also been raw and real and authentic.
And on every trip, I’ve picked myself up, built a new layer of self-trust, gotten myself out of countless tricky situations, and have generally just done the thing terrified.
And I am so proud of myself for that.
Travelling solo, through all its challenges, gave me the space to feel anxious without shaming myself about it. I can go slow. Skip social stuff. Say no to pub crawls and yes to quiet walks. And that’s okay.
Slowly, I started noticing little wins during my trips too: asking for help when I needed it, chatting to someone on a tour, trusting myself to figure things out… Because I am capable of that. We all are.
And now? I’m still a hot mess, to be honest! I also still get incredibly socially anxious. And solo travel hasn’t taken that away – but it has lessened – with my confidence growing, just a fraction, after every trip.
Katie’s Top Tip: I can’t really sum up all of my lived experiences into one sentence or one piece of advice, but I do want you to know this: nobody is judging you the way you think they are.
Why You Should Solo Travel With Social Anxiety
Solo travel with social anxiety will be one of the most healing things you ever do.
Why? Because it puts you in control.
You get to make decisions, face your fears and prove to yourself (little bit by little bit), that you’re capable, even when things feel scary.
There’s also something so powerful about seeing the world on your own terms… without having to people-please, overthink or pretend to be anyone you’re not.
Over time, you’ll grow your independence, deepen your self-trust and, maybe for the first time, feel proud of yourself in a way that doesn’t depend on external validation.
And no, it’s not easy – but that’s kind of the entire point.
Katie’s Top Tip: Don’t wait until your social anxiety disappears to start living your life. You’re allowed to be anxious but also want so much more for your life at the same time.
When You Shouldn’t Solo Travel With Social Anxiety
Solo travel is incredible, but it’s not a magic fix for mental health.
If you’re in a place where your social anxiety is severely impacting your ability to function (for example, you’re struggling to leave the house, avoiding all social interactions, or experiencing panic attacks regularly), then now is not be the right time for a solo trip.
And that’s okay.
There is no shame in needing to seek more support first.
Therapy, medication (with the help of your doctor only), or simply more practice with gentle exposure at home are all good first steps.
I’ve forced myself to travel when I wasn’t ready on several occasions and have always regretted it. In fact, instead of feeling empowered, I just felt exhausted and didn’t end up enjoying the trip anyway.
So remember: prioritise your mental health first, always.
Katie’s Top Tip: If you’re not sure whether you’re ready, try a mini solo trip first. This could be anything from a day trip to a nearby city or an overnight stay somewhere local. It’s a great way to test your comfort zone without being far from home!
Tips To Overcome Social Anxiety When Travelling (That Actually Work)
If you are ready to try and solo travel with social anxiety, you’ll want some good tools to fall back on and help you feel calm, capable and in control.
These few tips aren’t magic fixes, but they have helped me time and time again when I’ve felt panicky or overstimulated. I hope they can help you too.
Tip 1: Prep Scripts in Advance
This might sound like basic advice, but one of the most underrated travel hacks for social anxiety is preparing scripts ahead of time.
With my social anxiety, even supposedly simple things like ordering at a café, asking for directions or checking into a hotel can feel huge to my brain.
In fact, I used to get so nervous I’d step aside and actively rehearse conversations under my breath before walking into a bakery (and then still freeze up or panic-order something I didn’t want, despite it all!)
So instead of winging it, I started writing out short phrases I knew I’d need. (And yes, you’ll probably feel a bit weird for doing this at first, but it does help).
I’ve actually found a snippet of one of my scripts from a few years ago in my phone, so here you go:
Hi. I have a reservation for 7 nights for Katie? I can show you the online confirmation if that helps?
Do I pay now or at the end? I can’t remember what it said in the email.
Okay, perfect. Thank you so much! Do I need a code or anything to get back in at night?”
That’s great. Thank you so much! Bye!
Scripts like these, no matter how simple, reduce decision fatigue and stop your brain from spiralling. And once you’ve said it a few times, your confidence genuinely grows. Win win!
Katie’s Top Tip: Save your go-to scripts in the notes app on your phone so you can easily glance at them before you need them. It sounds silly, but this one little habit helped me feel so much more confident a couple of years ago.
Tip 2: Have Practiced Grounding Techniques
Social anxiety will show up in the most annoying and impractical situations… In crowded hostel dorms, loud train stations or even mid-conversation when your brain suddenly goes, “nope! I can’t cope with this” out of nowhere.
That’s why having rehearsed, ready-to-go grounding techniques so important.
(And no, I’m not talking about vague “just breathe” advice you might see on TikTok!)
I mean specific, evidence-backed coping tools you’ve used before you travel.
For me, I swear by the 5-4-3-2-1 method (naming 5 things you see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell, 1 you can taste), and box breathing (inhale for 4, hold for 4, exhale for 4, hold for 4, repeat).
I’ve done both of these countless times: on planes, on the side of a busy street and even in the toilets of the Oslo Opera House! (Yes, really!)
Katie’s Top Tip: Practising your chosen techniques at home when you aren’t anxious helps you remember them when you are. You want them to feel like second nature by the time you solo travel with social anxiety.
Tip 3: Plan Quiet Time Each Day
Solo travel gets romanticised as being constant adventures, but when you have social anxiety, too much stimulation can make you feel worse.
That’s why building in quiet time every single day is so important.
I’m talking journaling in a local park, choosing a takeaway over dinner out after a busy day, getting an early night in with a book – whatever helps you feel better…
I used to feel so guilty for not making the most of every second of my trip.
But then I realised that my version of a good trip looked a little slower than other people’s – and that’s so okay. In fact, it’s the only thing that makes solo travel sustainable for me.
Katie’s Top Tip: Build a buffer into each day of your trip, where you have no plans. This is your mental reset time. Use it to do nothing, journal, scroll your phone, do whatever feels good in the moment.
Tip 4: Stay in Private Rooms
When you’re solo travelling with social anxiety, finding the right accommodation will make or break your trip.
If hostels feel too chaotic but hotels feel isolating, the sweet spot is booking a private room (and ideally a private bathroom), in a property that still has communal spaces.
That way, you’ve got your own space to retreat to, but you’re not cut off from interaction if you want it.
Katie’s Top Tip: Look for accommodation with reviews that say things like “quiet” or “boutique” or “relaxed” or even “good for solo travellers.”
Tip 5: Create Anchor Points
Possibly my favourite little trick for managing my solo travel anxiety is to find or create anchor points when I travel.
Anchor points are places, people or routines that make you feel safe and comfortable in an unfamiliar place.
For me, that means sticking to a non-negotiable travel morning routine and travel evening routine and also finding a café at the start of my trip that I can return to, so I don’t have the anxiety of ordering from a new place every day.
These small anchors give my brain something known to look forward to, helping me feel grounded, calm and a little less alone – even when I’m technically thousands of miles from home.
Katie’s Top Tip: On day one in a new city, pick one local spot that makes you feel comfortable (a café, a spot in a local park, a scenic walking route…) and claim it as yours. Then, throughout your trip, return to it regularly. Creating even small moments of familiarity is so important when you solo travel with social anxiety.
How to Meet People With Social Anxiety (If You Want To)
When you live with social anxiety, even saying hi in a communal kitchen can feel like an insurmountable task.
So if the idea of “just putting yourself out there” (they make it sound so easy, right?!) makes you feel queasy, I get it.
But I promise, there are gentler ways to connect with others (if you want to).
Start with low-pressure meet-ups.
Walking tours, in particular, are great because you’re all doing the same thing, with a guide leading the conversation. Plus they’re a great way to get your bearings in a new city!
And if you do stay in hostels or want to book other tours, look for activities like cooking classes or pottery or sports or small group excursions.
The key is to choose environments where you’ll be side-by-side with others but putting your energy and focus into something physical, rather than just the conversation.
Katie’s Top Tip: Have one go-to, non-cheesy icebreaker question ready before you enter a social situation. My favourite is “Have you done anything cool around here yet?” It’s an easy way to start a conversation and, as a bonus, I’ve learned some great local tips from it too!
What Happens When Things Go Wrong?
Even with all the planning and prep in the world, things will occasionally go wrong when you’re travelling.
You’ll miss a bus, your card will get blocked or your Airbnb will feel off and you need to leave and find new accommodation…
And when you’re already managing social anxiety, even the smallest thing can hit hard.
(I’ve even had spirals so bad I’ve googled flights home mid-breakdown – over something as small as a train being delayed).
But none of that means you’re failing. You’re just human.
When things do go wrong, the most powerful thing you can do is pause. Take slow breaths, drink some water and remove any urgency or panic from the situation.
Once you’ve done that, then you can go into problem-solving mode, asking: what’s the very next step I can take? (Not fixing everything – just the next small thing). Maybe it’s calling your bank. Googling the next train. Booking a different hotel. Take it one step at a time.
I promise, the moment you take even one small action, the overwhelm will start to shrink.
Most things feel 100x worse in the moment than they do even a few hours later.
Katie’s Top Tip: Keep a note on your phone for when you panic. Mine has my grounding exercises, emergency contact info, trusted people at home I can talk to, and a simple, one sentence reminder that I can do hard things. Think of it as Past You showing up for Present You when you most need her!
Other Ways to Travel If Solo Travel Feels Too Much
If the idea of solo travel with social anxiety feels like too big a leap right now, you can choose a different path.
You don’t have to force yourself into something that doesn’t feel right in this season of your life.
There are so many ways to travel without being totally alone!
For example, you could consider a women only group tour, where everything is pre-organised for you. Or plan a trip with your best friend. Or even go for a solo day trip in your area to build confidence, without leaving your comfort zone too far behind.
Katie’s Top Tip: Look for small-group organised tours with a clear itinerary and optional downtime built in. It gives you structure without constant pressure to be social or having to deal with all of the logistics by yourself.
Final Thoughts
Solo travel with social anxiety can be incredibly empowering. But it’s also messy, emotional and full of learning curves.
And every time you choose to take one small step forward, you are rebuilding self-confidence and proving to yourself that you can handle more than your anxiety tells you.
So you’re already winning, in my book!
And if it helps: I’ve felt how you are feeling right now. Sometimes, I still do.
I’ve googled “am I too anxious to travel solo?” at 1am. I’ve stared at flights I wanted to book for weeks before talking myself out of it. I’ve had panic attacks in airports and cried in hotel rooms and still come out the other side.
It’s definitely not easy. But it is worth it. I promise.
What’s your dream solo trip? Let me know in the comments! (Mine is to Lake Bled, Slovenia to see the autumn colours!)
Read More About Solo Female Travel:
- 11 Solo Travel Tips for Introverts To Feel Confident
- Solo Travel With Social Anxiety: What It’s Really Like
- 11 Tips to Overcome Solo Travel Anxiety (That Actually Work)
- 7 Steps to Create a Solo Travel Evening Routine You Love
- 7 Easy Steps to a Stress-Free Solo Travel Morning Routine
